Monday, July 15, 2013

Getting Un-Stuck

I honestly cannot think of a more unpleasant, nagging, awful feeling than that of feeling stuck.  Think about it. Feeling stuck sucks. Literally… sucks your energy, your positive outlook, your precious time and your resources.

Stuck in a job you don’t particularly care for? You are probably not alone.  Stuck in a relationship that is going nowhere or is deteriorating? Yeah, I’ve been there too.  Whatever your particular situation, the general feeling of being stuck is one I can relate to very much. It is suffocating.

One of the most annoying things about this whole business of feeling stuck is how incredibly crystal clear the picture of being un-stuck is in your mind’s eye. You can see it, but you just can’t figure out how to get there. You say, “If only it were that simple to change this or that, I would.”  And then you are off in dreamland, skipping around happily in the field of this place or circumstance removed from whatever obstacle that may be your own personal quicksand.  You see yourself free.

I’m not going to pretend to hold some master key to universal happiness. That would be insane. I am not about to jump down the rabbit hole with you.

But I will say this much: I know that the very freedom I so desperately sought, I have now in some capacity. Is my life everything I want it to be right now? I’m still working on that one.  But do I feel stuck? No. I can honestly say that I do not. The road wasn’t pretty. It wasn’t an easy decision. There were hard choices to make. But it was, at the very least, a decision.  When I felt stuck, I was miserable.  When I was miserable, I imagine that some of that misery was contagious.  It’s not a good way to live life. 

When I felt truly stuck, I can pretty much always trace back the root feeling behind it: fear. 

I have always been terrified to let go. Letting go of the tight grip of control. Accepting that control itself is an illusion. And finally, moving from thought to action.

What I am realizing after hitting numerous dead ends, running in circles and suffering serious waves of anxiety is this: if you hold too tightly with a closed fist, your hands are not open to receive what could be handed to you freely. 

And if you are not willing to face your fear of making the decision to confront the perceived blocks in your way, you will surely remain firmly planted wherever you are…and that my friends, is not living. 

Life has a natural flow. It moves forward. And the only moment that is yours to mold and shape as you please is this one right now.

Let’s support our best life possible. If there is something that is preventing the natural flow of your life from moving forward, perhaps it is time to let go and go with the flow of life.

Letting go is not giving up.  Surrender is not defeat.  It is simply the action of opening up your mind to the possibility of life unstuck.

If you find yourself feeling stuck, it might just be time to do something about it.  But get ready; the momentum of getting un-stuck can be quite overwhelming too.  The reality that follows probably won't look exactly like the picture you imagined all along. But nothing ever is.

Accept that fact, and the battle is half over already.

Life is for the living. So go for it.  Loosen your grip and get moving!


Try this refreshing little drink I dreamt up last night. I call it the:

Sailor's Delight

Stoli Razz
Lemonade and top off with Pama liquer


  1. It has been said that "a rut is nothing more than a shallow grave". You have provided a valuable perspective on getting out of a rut.

  2. I appreciate that!!!! I definitely know that feeling all too well!!!

  3. Very well said,inspiring and wise!